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A girl just shy of coherence


August 24th, 2011

I can't believe there's talent on America's Got Talent @ 12:38 pm


One of my guilty pleasures this summer is watching America's Got Talent, and I have to say I'm astounded by the exquisite and gigantic talent of some of the contestants. In particular I'm rooting for Lys Agnés and iLuminate.

So, if you haven't been watching, prepare for a treat. iLuminate is a dance troupe that slither and slide across a darkened stage illuminate by frenetically changing neon, and you can imagine how rad that looks. It really should be seen on the big screen for full effect, but you can get an idea by looking at the clips here. They've blown me away every time I've seen them. Their costumes and the choreography were invented by a woman whose name escapes me, and she sits backstage during every performance frantically coding the flashing lights from her laptop. Yes. She does this live:

Team iLuminate:








Lys Agnés is just...let the clips speak for themselves. She's gorgeous, she has a voice to die for, and she tears through those arias with grace and vibrancy.

Lys Agnés:









The joy on her face when she sings is heartbreaking and infectious simultaneously.

Just.

Awesome.

There's plenty of other gold on America's Got Talent this season but for me? I want both of the above to win.
 

August 22nd, 2011

Furious Wanghammer seeks Angry Awl @ 11:48 am

So I read Comics Alliance. The other day I stumble across a link (thanks to Eric Trautmann) to the Let's Be Friends Again forum wherein I find an epic discussion thread about comics.

The catch? None of the comics, characters, or creators actually exist. But don't let that stop you from reading because I was literally crying with laughter.

Excerpted for your pleasure:

Post by Alfonso Granito-Byrne

RE: The Next Event Comic

Torris Tanbull dropped off the grid to teach art in Seattle for a minute, and the rumor has it that he flipped out a bit. He started producing underground greatness like SPONGEPLUNGER and PAM LAMB IS ON THE LAM, the latter mistaken for a children's book and ordered in large numbers as part of a No Child Left Behind reading initiative.

Given that Torris was actually producing these things on a hand-crank press in his basement, and probably also due to his rather severe crystal meth habit, the poor bastard broke his wrist trying to crank out (no pun intended) the 78,000 copies that he had already cashed the check for.

Of course, the PAM LAMB book is literally nothing but really violent, exquisitely-detailed barnyard porn from panel one to panel last, so the 1300 copies that actually saw print were promptly shredded, burnt, glued back together and shredded again. Luckily, Torris had already been institutionalized, which is probably the only thing that kept him from a lengthy prison sentence.

He's on MySpace.

By the way, I may have come on a little strong. I do enjoy some mainstream books. Sherm Farley's Frontier Dinocologist series is good, and I'm finding things to like about the current run of Furious Wanghammer.



The genius of the posters astounds me. There's no way I could ever come up with something that good.

So, read. Enjoy. Read read read read read A++++ recommendation.

I would totally read a comic called Furious Wanghammer.
 

August 16th, 2011

Great. Juuuuuust great. My e-mail was hacked. @ 10:34 am


When I attempted to sign onto e-mail this morning, Yahoo tells me that my account was "compromised." It took forever to change my password and log onto e-mail. At first glance nothing looks missing, but if any of you received weird e-mails from me in the last twenty-four hours, please let me know. My sent folder shows no e-mail sent but with hackers I'm sure there's a way around that.

My fear is that they'll comb through my contact list and send out viruses to my precious friends and family.

Anything else I should do other than change my password?

Ugh. Just what I needed right now.
 

August 1st, 2011

A spoiler free cogitation on Captain America @ 05:22 pm

Yes, I finally saw Captain America. This gives me a legit occasion to utter one of my favorite things:

HAIL HYDRA!



I squeed and squeed.

HOWEVER. Before I saw the film, I was having a reasonable discussion with Eric Trautmann, asking him what he thought of the film because I hold his opinions in high regard - yes, I'm naming names - and he warned me to watch out for an enjoyable Easter egg in the film during the World's Fair scene.

I was so busy frantically looking at the borders of the screen during the World's Fair part of the film, looking for the Easter egg, that I missed the Easter Egg entirely. The fact that it was one of my favorite Marvel characters makes me hang my head in shame and the fact that it was front and center makes me headdesk repeatedly.

And the scene after the credits? More squeeage, but also umbrage that Black Widow is apparently a gentleman.

Detailed review of the film to follow tomorrow. Shield fu galore!
 

June 13th, 2011

User-generated content rules. @ 12:21 pm


This is the dopest shit I have see (or rather, heard) in a really long time. It's from Wallpaper, and the track name is #STUPiDFACEDD. Yes, hash tag and all. I can't get get this song out of my head. It doesn't hurt that the hilarious video has a bit of a Donnie Darko vibe by way of Bat for Lashes:

White girls buy produce, take 'em home, make them drink Gray Goose:






And now, a YouTube clip that exactly exemplifies my feelings about shopping at Whole Foods.

It's getting real in the Whole Foods parking lot:



 

May 6th, 2011

Theme for the month: despair.com @ 02:38 pm


So I opened the front door to my building yesterday morning to find that someone had jimmied open my mailbox and stolen all my mail. They got two day's worth of mail and I've NO idea what I've lost.

The property management company still hasn't replaced the lock. I had to go to the post office and have them put a hold on my mail. I had to call my bank, the utilities company, the phone company, all the credit reporting agencies and have them put a fraud alert on my accounts.

And I have to call the DMV to make sure that no one will try to register a car under my name fraudulently.

I'm wracking my brain trying to think of who else to call...my health insurance company, I guess, to make sure no one opens a policy in my name. I have to go to the bank today to close my account and open another.

It took the police three hours to get to my house to document and make a report. I know my city is busy and I called right towards the end of a shift, but jeez, guys, PLEASE. I'm dying over here. Fortunately the police officer was very nice and entertained me with stories of how their fingerprint experts HATE CSI (the TV shows, not real life CSI in general) because they constantly show surfaces that you can supposedly lift prints from that you cannot, in fact, lift prints from.

Anyone else I should call? Flist, have I missed something crucial?

Identity thieves: FUCK YOU.
 

May 3rd, 2011

Yes, but where was the formal wear? @ 02:20 pm

Tags: ,

I fully expected President Obama to come out in a tux and holding a flute of champagne when he appeared Sunday night to deliver the news about Osama Bin Laden. I also expected him to look like this:



Opportunities lost, Mr. President.

(Okay, I kid, I kid. His statement was concise and appropriately sober in tone. But you KNOW there was a private party at the White House that night, and you know that the President high fived at least one person.)

I'm torn about releasing the picture of his body. I surely won't be looking at it because it sound entirely gruesome, but given that some people actually still think the U.S. didn't assassinate Bin Laden, I think it's necessary to provide visual proof.

Was anyone surprised that he was hiding in Pakistan? The country that has almost openly given aid and succor to Al Qaeda for years? Really not surprised here.
 

April 12th, 2011

I have nothing pithy to pit...I mean put here. @ 03:11 pm


Just this, via Trautmann:


Oh, the walrus is gonna be PISSED:

Polar bear cub steals blue bucket, world financial empires collapse:







I love how mom plays with him at the end after a "What. Are. You. Doing." moment of aghastery.
 

March 21st, 2011

Someone please tell me that they have this issue @ 05:03 pm


AAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!

Jack!

Someone PLEASE tell me that they have this issue:





JackohmahgawJACK!

AWWWW!

(For those not understanding the squee!flail that's Jack of Hearts, one of my favorite B-listers from Marvel. He died but apparently in the Marvel Zombieverse got better.

ETA: It's a solicit for May 2011 with Michael Komarck on gorgeous cover duties. I am so excited that I can hardly sit still. How will I make it to May? How, I ask you?
 

March 15th, 2011

Gallianofail @ 01:49 pm


By now a lot of you have heard that John Galliano, enfante terrible of Christan Dior, was filmed committing an anti-Semitic outburst a few days ago in a Paris bistro.

Some people are defending his actions, namely fellow designers, models, fashion editors, stylists, editors in chief of glossy couture magazines, photographers, etc.

I don't care how drunk you are. This obviously comes from his heart:







He's telling the couple that filmed him in a Paris restaurant that he "loves Hitler" and tallks about how their ancestors should/would have been gassed during WWII. People in turn are accusing the couple of provoking him into the outburst to which I say scratch deep enough and look what bubbles up from the id: how you really feel about Jews, blacks, Latinos, Native Americans, Asians, etc.

What sickens me is the swell of support from the world of couture for Galliano. It's so nakedly anti-Semitic that I feel like retching when I read it.

After giving the typical "I'm going into rehab" speech to the press (is there rehab for racism? Are there rehab centers in Monte Carlo or something for stone cold racism?), Galliano is laying low.

There's a fashion blog on LJ run by wendylady2. She posits that she's a middle class white British woman and that she doesn't want to rush to judge Galliano and wants to present a fair and balanced piece on what he said and did. She goes on to show and review his Spring collection in the same post.

What kind of message does that send? That fashion is just as important as racism?

I call bullshit. I'm so mad that I've been seeing through a red haze for days now. The outpouring of support for Galliano is worse than Polanskifail.

Alcohol is no excuse for being a stone cold racist ass.
 

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A girl just shy of coherence